A Positive Change in Circumstances (Life after a Carer’s assessment)

It’s good to be back, it’s been so long since I found the time to sit down and update my blog.

In my last post I promised to report back following my ‘Carer’s Assessment’ so apologies it has taken me so long .  It’s almost 10 months since I wrote that post.  So much has happened during that time with my dad’s health and wellbeing, which has been, and still is my main priority.

Carer’s Assessment 

Having a Carer’s assessment was the best thing for me, I found it very relaxed and centred on me and not my dad. . All of my time has been taken up with my dads health, how he was feeling, what he needed and how I could support him.  I never once thought about myself, or how this change in circumstances was impacting on my general health and wellbeing.

My Carer’s assessment was carried out by an experienced social worker

The social worker wanted to know about my work and career, my family, my feelings and above all else she wanted to know how she could support me. . .I realised this was the first time I had talked to anyone about the pressure I had been under, I had kept everything to myself and had just got on with what I needed to do.

To cut a long story short, the outcome was the realisation that I needed support to look after my dad, the social worker made me realise I couldn’t carry on doing this on my own therefore, I agreed for a meeting to take place with my dad to discuss the need for a ‘Care Package’ to be put in place.

Discussing the Care Package with Dad:

A few weeks later, the meeting took place, and I made sure that my dad understood the options available and after much discussion regarding his needs, he agreed to the support that would come from professional Carer’s.  We agreed on a 5 day package Monday – Friday consisting of 3 half hour calls a day (I would take care of the weekends as dad spent most of them at my home)

Morning – Making sure my dad was up, washed, dressed and had breakfast and prompt medication.

Lunchtime – Making sure dad had prepared or needed lunch preparing and to prompt medication

Dinner – Making sure dad had prepared or needed dinner preparing

I would still be visiting everyday in between these visits, and taking care of his medication before bed. I would still continue to take him for all his hospital appointments, pension, shopping.  I would still be doing all his washing and cleaning, and taking care of his monthly bills and finances (as dad had stopped taking care of all of this)

The Care Package:

A few weeks later the care package commenced, and although I was very apprehensive about it, I soon realised how the support of professional Carer’s was giving me some peace of mind, as well as a little bit of time to myself each day.  I had just spent almost 2 years looking after dad as well as supporting my daughter with picking my granddaughters up from school, or after school clubs etc. . I was spending every day racing against time, making sure I was up early to get to my dads to support him with washing/dressing/eating/medication, it had been exhausting and I hadn’t even realised how it was impacting on me. . I am so glad I took the advice to have a carer assessment.

I have been very involved in getting my dads care package right, it hasn’t been easy and there have been days that things had not gone as expected, in fact there have been days when I was close to cancelling the whole package of care due to quite a few instances, but I will report back on this. . Hopefully it won’t take me 10 months this time.

Talk soon

Chris x


2 thoughts on “A Positive Change in Circumstances (Life after a Carer’s assessment)

  1. Hi Chris I’m glad you didn’t cancel the package of care, though I know what you mean about sometimes not going as hoped. Currently my mum is sitting downstairs with a carer to give me respite, and the whole conversation since the carer arrived has been about where is Julia (me) and its time to be going home. I normally handle this, when mum wants to go home, and hearing someone else who hasn’t got the experience of how to support mum, makes me want to go an help to ensure mum doesn’t get too agitated. Hardly restful. However, most the time it works and I can usually get lots done or simply catch up with sleep during these breaks. We need to take care of ourselves, and this support is critical to that. Hang on in there.


    • Hi Julia, thank you so much for taking the time to comment on my post. I must admit I’ve not really found the time to update my blog in the last 12 months, but I am hoping to expand on it soon as so much has happened that may inspire or help others. I really agree with you about the Carers, it’s hard to observe sometimes when you know they are not giving your mum (my dad) what they need. I think once you become involved in caring for your parent, then only you know best and it’s so difficult to let go isn’t it?

      I am wondering if you have the support of the Admiral Nurses, as I have found having Jackie (my admiral nurse) has been a godsend, she supports me, let’s me talk, and helps me to put so much into perspective regarding my dads care, how I feel, and generally advising when I’m lost for the next steps. She has made me understand that I need time off, time to do things for me, even if it is just a day out, to switch off, without feeling guilty. Sometimes we just need someone to say “you’re doing ok”

      I will keep in touch, as it’s nice to have someone who is going through the same, to chat with and see another’s perspective on this caring journey.

      Enjoy your day
      Regards Chris x


Leave a Reply to juliasdementiablog Cancel reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.